Back to the drawing board with the words you've heard a million times before. In your head, I am dead..

I had a conversation today with a good friend of mine, we'll call her CM. We've both got relationship woes and have been bonding over the hurt we've accumulated from other people. After venting our little hearts out about how stupid men are, I started to think of my "dream man". My idealistic guy that I'd like to spend happily ever after with. Now, I watch a lot of movies so my dream man is actually a character from the movie Road Trip. Rubin Carver; he's tall, dark and handsome, he's funny, he's incredibly smart, the right level of nerdy, a stand-up guy and knows how to relax after a hectic day. I continued to tell CM how I thought I had found my Rubin Carver, and how utterly uncanny the comparison was. But it's just not working out the way I'd expected it to. CM went on to tell me she thought she found her dream man in her ex. I just can't wrap my brain around how these two relationships are not working. There is really no obvious reason why they shouldn't work. CM is the most gorgeous girl I know, she's passionate, she's kind and caring, she's supportive and makes good decisions, she's fun and funny. I have trouble touting my own horn, but I like to think I'm smarter than the average girl (except in regards to relationships), I'm funny (at least I make myself laugh), I'm really laid back, enjoy doing things with "the boys" more than "the girls", I'm supportive, adventurous, considerate and patient. And the chemistry between both parties is the type of stuff written about in cheesy teen romance novels. I think that both CM and I are probably a couple of the best ladies you could find out there. So why don't these dream men seem to see it like that? I understand idealism can be a dangerous thing since it's almost always nearly impossible to live up to someone's idealistic expectations. I understand no one is perfect. But idealism aside, why when the chemistry is there, do things not work out? Are CM and I blinded by "perfection"? Were these relationships much like the cake and just one big fat lie? I can't see another explanation to these scenarios that doesn't get chalked up to smooth-talking lies. That really disappoints me on both accounts because selfishness is something I can tolerate very little of. Especially when truly good people are the ones who suffer because of it.